The Whoopin of Chet Turtleback

(A woman's house.) Woman: Chet Turtleback! I don't know why you're here, but if my pappy catches you, he's gonna hogtie you and give you the whoopin of your life. Turtleback: Come on now, Betsy. You seen me take whoopins before. You knows I can take a whoopin. Woman: You better git now. Git while the gittin's good. (Exit Turtleback. He goes to the bank.) Teller: Chet Turtleback! If the manager finds out that you only have twenty-five cents in your account, he's gonna come out here and handcuff you to that chair and give you the whoopin of your life. Turtleback: But you seen me take whoopins. You knows I can take it, especially back whoopins. Teller: Go on now. Git! (Exit Turtleback. He goes to the Post Office.) Turtleback: Can I mail this letter? Clerk: Chet Turtleback! If the postmaster catches you in here mailing letters, he's gonna tie your hands behind your back, hoist you off the floor by your rib cage, and give you the whoopin of your whole entire life!
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© 2007, 2012. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.